Poor late-night comedians.  They’d love to crack jokes about Barack Obama, but there’s just no material there.

Letterman writer Mike Barry says, “The thing is, he’s not buffoonish in any way.  He’s not a comical figure.”  Letterman producer Rob Burnett adds, “We can’t manufacture a perception. If the perception isn’t true, no one will laugh at it.”  Jimmy Kimmel agrees:  “I think it’s more a problem because he’s so polished, he doesn’t seem to have any flaws.”

No flaws?  None?  These men apparently didn’t notice any of Obama’s many flubs on the campaign trail, or his periodic casting off of mentors, friends and grandmothers.

How about arrogance, the comedian’s best friend?  Obama sincerely believes his own hype.  No potential for comedy there?  How about a riff on”…this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to fall and our planet began to heal?“

What about Obama’s youth and inexperience?  Why is McCain’s age funny but Obama’s isn’t?  Because his inexperience is too frightening a prospect to joke about?

Okay, Obama’s off limits.  We have a bunch of white comedians who won’t tell a joke about a black candidate.  Couldn’t you at least poke fun at his white fans?  Those who think he’s a lightworker or those media members (like Chris Matthews) whose legs tingle when he speaks?

No?  Then you jokewriters have got to be fired, because you’re just not trying.

Lightworker

The Drudge Report headline read: “Lady Thatcher to be honored with state funeral.”

I was surprised, to say the least. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t heard that Margaret Thatcher had died. Clicking the link, I arrived at the Daily Mail, which clarified things:

Margaret Thatcher is to be given the ultimate accolade of a State funeral when she reaches the end of her days – the first British Prime Minister since Winston Churchill to be afforded such an honour.

Oh, so she’s not dead.  Maybe she’s on her deathbed?  Well, no…

Although Lady Thatcher is currently in good health – she was with the Queen at Buckingham Palace on Tuesday – The Mail on Sunday has learned that plans are under way for her funeral, when the time eventually comes, to take place at St Paul’s Cathedral.

Okay.  So is this really news?  There is a plan in place for Margaret Thatcher’s eventual funeral.  Thank goodness!  I’m sure everyone had been worried about that.

So what was the point of the story?  Believe it or not, it was this:

…[T]he possibility of a formal procession could be jeopardised by fears that there are insufficient troops available to line the route because the Armed Forces are so overstretched in Afghanistan and Iraq.

Is this what they call “flooding the zone?”  Is this supposed to change someone’s mind about the current war?  It must be, because it’s certainly not a newsworthy story.

I’m trying hard to imagine a bewhiskered peer of the realm reading this story.  His monocle drops into his tea as he leaps to his feet.  “By God, I was four-square with the Yanks until now, but the prospect of insufficient pomp at Lady Thatcher’s funeral?  We must withdraw immediately.  Consequences be hanged!”

Or maybe, it’s aimed at the Left: George Galloway is standing on an orange crate in Hyde Park, haranguing passersby with tales of war crimes committed in their name upon innocent Iraqis.  A friend taps him on the shoulder and whispers in his ear, “Lady Thatcher probably won’t live more than ten more years.  If we don’t withdraw any troops from the Middle East by then it may prove mildly embarrassing to the Conservative Party.”  Galloway, without a pause, begins shouting, “Stay the course!  We must not abandon our freedom-loving Iraqi friends!”

Nope.  Doesn’t work either way.

Reader Brittany Marie makes a good point about my last post.

…[W]hile I understand that you are not happy, it does not seem very good of you to post half the story and then blame it on his scientific occupation. The interaction of science and religion is not that clear cut for you to make such an assumption.

She was the only commenter who mentioned this, and it’s the one part of my post I think I’d do differently.  I should have left out this part:

And scientists are always butting heads with the Church because the Church says things like, “Well yes, you can do things like cloning embryos but you shouldn’t, and here’s why…”  To which the enlightened scientists respond by screaming, falling down and kicking their heels against the floor.  Because they’re so smart and important and how dare you judge them?

Not good writing, and not clear thinking.

My problem is that I don’t have much patience for people who believe that science can prove anything about God.  (I’m thinking of Richard Dawkins, here.)  Or, for that matter, that the Bible (Koran, Torah, etc.) can prove anything about the physical world.  (Feel free to discuss Gallileo below.)

However, while the Church has rightly backed off from overruling scientists’ findings, there are a number of scientists who show no such humility.  They seem to believe that science is capable of having anything to say on the subject of God, when science is only useful in understanding the material world.

In a way, it’s like the conflict between relativity theory and quantum theory.  They each work perfectly in the spheres for which they were designed, but if you try to use them both you get gibberish.  (That’s only an analogy.  The intersection of scientific research with correct moral teaching has resulted in the capability of producing stem cells without cloning humans.)

All that said, I shouldn’t have characterized scientists en masse as a bunch of babies who can’t bear to be told “no.”  That was not helpful to the discussion.

Further reading:

Why Science Cannot Address the Existence of God

Recently, Paul Myers, an associate professor at the University of Minnesota had this to say about the Eucharist in a post entitled “It’s a Frackin’ Cracker!”

I have an idea. Can anyone out there score me some consecrated communion wafers? There’s no way I can personally get them — my local churches have stakes prepared for me, I’m sure — but if any of you would be willing to do what it takes to get me some, or even one, and mail it to me, I’ll show you sacrilege, gladly, and with much fanfare… [I will]treat it with profound disrespect and heinous cracker abuse, all photographed and presented here on the web. I shall do so joyfully and with laughter in my heart. If you can smuggle some out from under the armed guards and grim nuns hovering over your local communion ceremony, just write to me and I’ll send you my home address.

I’m not going to link to his blog, but it’s easily accessible through the university’s web site, here.  (Scroll down until you see Paul Myers, then click the link.)  [Update: the link has since been removed.  If you want to find the site, search for "paul myers frackin cracker" here.  His blog is called Pharyngula.]

Here are some of the comments from his fans:

Well, this is a community that believes that every sperm is sacred…

Those f——s worship an imaginary a—– who told his acolytes, “Eat me,” and his name wasn’t even Michael Valentine Smith. They give these gomers drivers licenses and guns, too.

It is certainly sacred when it gets pooped out…I’m sure I’ve Jesus in the toilet bowl more than once…

These are from the first twenty or so comments, and there are hundreds of comments.  I’m sure these comments are from people who normally congratulate themselves on their tolerance.  Why the hate?  Well, you see it’s a science blog.  And scientists are always butting heads with the Church because the Church says things like, “Well yes, you can do things like cloning embryos but you shouldn’t, and here’s why…”  To which the enlightened scientists respond by screaming, falling down and kicking their heels against the floor.  Because they’re so smart and important and how dare you judge them?

Apparently, Myers got some flack for this post from the Catholic League and he’s asking people to e-mail the university’s president to defend him.  Here’s the e-mail address.  The president’s name is Robert Bruininks.

Here’s mine:

Dear Mr. Bruininks:

 I am appalled at the bigotry of your professor, Paul Z. Myers.  His mockery of a religion’s most solemn beliefs–and threat to commit the most outrageous sacrilege–is a sorry statement on the quality of your faculty.  The man seems to be motivated by nothing but malicious cruelty and an overwhelming hatred of Christianity.  If you have any interest in ensuring that your students are taught not only information but morality, decency, and tolerance for the beliefs of others, please do the right thing and discipline him.

 Write your own if you feel like it.

Fed Plans New Rules to Protect Future Homebuyers

[The mortgage rules] would prohibit lenders from engaging in a pattern or practice of lending without considering a borrower’s ability to repay a home loan from sources other than the home’s value.

This is a rule that shouldn’t need to exist.  But if lenders stop lending money to black and hispanic prospective homebuyers based on their ability to repay, expect Congressional hearings.

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Frozen Embryos Better Than Fresh, Study Shows

Infants born from embryos which were frozen and then thawed before being implanted into a woman had a higher birth weight and were less likely to suffer abnormalities.

Perhaps all embryos should be frozen?  Oh, wait…

“We think the reason for the differences is probably positive selection of the embryos for frozen embryo replacement, [said Dr. Anja Pinborg.] 

 ”Only the very top quality embryos survive the freezing and thawing process.”

That which does not kill you makes you stronger.  Of course, the embryos that had been frozen still had malformation rates of 7.1 percent.  They’re obviously not killing enough of them.

————-

Higher CO2 Levels May Be Good for Plants: German Scientists

How many German scientists does it take to prove the obvious?

————–

Stealing Recyclables Is Good Business

With prices for aluminum, cardboard and newsprint going up and an economic slowdown putting added pressure on people’s pocketbooks, curbside refuse has become a hot commodity.

A truck piled high with mixed recyclables can fetch upward of $1,000; newspapers alone can grab about $600.

Why is my city–Stamford, Connecticut–spending $1.5 million next year on recycling when ”thieves” will do it for free?

US Removes Uranium from Iraq

A huge shipment of uranium arrived in Canada from Iraq on Saturday, according to the AP. 

The removal of 550 metric tons of “yellowcake” - the seed material for higher-grade nuclear enrichment - was a significant step toward closing the books on Saddam’s nuclear legacy.

So let’s get this straight.  British intelligence informs President Bush that Iraq had been seeking yellowcake uranium from Niger.  The President mentions that fact during his State of the Union address.  Joe Wilson writes an editorial for the New York Times that contradicts this intelligence.  (Wilson had tea with Nigerien officials, and only a blackguard would lie while sipping tea.)  Bob Novak wants to know who this Wilson fella is, and why he was assigned the job of checking out this information.  Richard Armitage tells Novak it was at the request of Wilson’s wife, Valerie Plame (a CIA employee), who wanted her husband out from underfoot.  All hell breaks loose, and Scooter Libby gets sentenced to 30 months in prison for contradicting Matt Cooper.

Confused?  Don’t be.  Just repeat after me: Saddam Hussein never had any intention of developing weapons of mass destruction and didn’t even have the means to do so.

Give or take 550 metrics tons of uranium.

I urge you to read the whole article. 

An excerpt:

American and Iraqi forces are driving Al-Qaeda in Iraq out of its last redoubt in the north of the country in the culmination of one of the most spectacular victories of the war on terror.

After being forced from its strongholds in the west and centre of Iraq in the past two years, Al-Qaeda’s dwindling band of fighters has made a defiant “last stand” in the northern city of Mosul.

A huge operation to crush the 1,200 fighters who remained from a terrorist force once estimated at more than 12,000 began on May 10.

Operation Lion’s Roar, in which the Iraqi army combined forces with the Americans’ 3rd Armoured Cavalry Regiment, has already resulted in the death of Abu Khalaf, the Al-Qaeda leader, and the capture of more than 1,000 suspects.

I hope the suspects will be held by the Iraqis.

The headline reads “Ancient Tablet Ignites Debate on Messiah and Resurrection.”  Apparently, a stone tablet has been found which describes a messiah who will die and rise again after three days.  The problem–according to the New York Times–is that the tablet predates Jesus Christ.

“This should shake our basic view of Christianity,” [Israel Knohl] said as he sat in his office of the Shalom Hartman Institute in Jerusalem where he is a senior fellow in addition to being the Yehezkel Kaufman Professor of Biblical Studies at Hebrew University.  [Me: He is also selling a book on the subject.]  “Resurrection after three days becomes a motif developed before Jesus, which runs contrary to nearly all scholarship. What happens in the New Testament was adopted by Jesus and his followers based on an earlier messiah story.”

In other words, the early Christians’ fanciful story of a “resurrection” was based upon a myth that had been current in the Middle East prior to the birth of Jesus.

There are four questions I would like to ask the author of the piece:

1. What tests have been done to ascertain the tablet’s age, and the age of the writing?  The article states that “its authenticity has so far faced no challenge,” which is ambiguous.  Does no one have any grounds on which to challenge it, or have its custodians not allowed any examination by critical eyes?  Also, we’re not talking about a traditional engraving, but words written in ink upon stone.  How common was this practice?  Has the ink been tested?
2. Has anyone except Mr. Israel Knohl been able to read the entire text?  One scholar, Moshe Bar-Asher, is quoted by the Times as saying: “In crucial places of the text there is lack of text. I understand Knohl’s tendency to find there keys to the pre-Christian period, but in two to three crucial lines of text there are a lot of missing words.”  This is reminiscent of The Da Vinci Code method of research.  Dan Brown made a lot of money off one missing word in a Gnostic text.
3. Were you aware that there are many myths concerning the death and resurrection of a god?  Those myths, like the one Mr. Knohl can read on this tablet, are irrelevant to the matter except insofar as they are pre-echoes of the actual event.  The New York Times apparently is unaware that Chrisitianity is based upon the assertion of a fact: the resurrection of a specific man at a specific time.  If that can be demonstrated to be false, then Christianity is a lie.  No amount of evidence of earlier resurrection traditions can prove Christ did not rise from the dead.

For Christians, this tablet–real or fake–is a non-issue.  But that doesn’t mean you won’t be hearing more about it in the months to come.

Oh, yes.  My fourth question: why are you running this story in July?  Don’t you normally save these for Easter?

Madonna Constantine, a professor of psychology at Columbia University, has been fired for plagiarism.  The investigation into these charges had been underway at the time of the discovery of a noose hanging from her office door.

My guess is the same as it was last October.  The question of who hung the noose will never be answered, but it seems pretty clear, doesn’t it?  I wonder if Columbia has handed over to the police the video recording that might settle the question?